As Winter Break quickly approaches, so too does the promise of countless holiday festivities, traditions, and celebrations. To many, the holiday season is an enjoyable period – a time to gather with family, play games, enjoy delicious home-cooked meals, and reminisce on the year that will shortly come to a close. But the holiday season is also notorious for another thing, its stress.
By their very nature, the holidays and stress are strongly linked. Enumerable polls have found that a major portion of America deals with increased pressure in the month of December. In fact, this year, according to the American Psychiatric Association, “28% of Americans say they are experiencing more stress related to the holiday season than they did last year.” But with all these pressing statistics, the real questions get lost. It’s easy to associate stress with this season, but what is more complicated is coming to a consensus on why that is so, and even more importantly (for one’s mental health at least), determining how to cope with this reality. To find some answers, I interviewed a handful of West Campus students to get their opinions on the matter.
Those interviewed effectively listed a plethora of stressors active in their holiday plans.
For one, the struggle to find gifts for family members and lesser-known relatives was an obvious worry. In this department, trying to gauge the interests of family can sometimes be like feeling around in the dark and the uncertainty of whether your gift for someone will be a hit or a miss inevitably leads to some degree of anxiety. “The biggest thing I stress over is trying to please everyone with gift-giving,” confesses one senior.
As the holidays usually involve lots of people packed in close quarters, many respondents reported feeling cramped, especially those in larger families. And although being close to loved-ones can be a very quintessential and pleasant part of the season, it can also leave people feeling a lack of privacy, which is not so enjoyable.
Family gatherings also result in a mix of diverse opinions, which sometimes clash. When in these situations, it can be hard to keep yourself composed and out of the fray. When things erupt, as in some families they often do, one can only be left to, as one respondent says, “pick up the pieces.” Navigating political differences and controversial topics ultimately takes the fun out of things, not to mention the harm someone’s views may have if they negatively apply to you. Sometimes equally discouraging, elder relatives can be controlling or close-minded. One sophomore described his experiences as difficult in that he has to watch how he acts “around grandparents that are very pushy and like to have things go their way.” Sounds familiar! While it isn’t always the case, these conflicts can undoubtedly increase anxiety and make people afraid to voice their opinions around their own kin.
Moreover, families can often strive for holiday perfection or aim to execute traditions to a tee. Given that traditions can hold enormous importance, this desire to see things recreated is not unjustified; however, achieving perfection can not only be unrealistic but also problematic. One senior states that, in their family, “everyone wants everything to be their version of perfect, which leads to misunderstandings and disagreements every year.” They go on to summarize the thoughts of many other interviewees, saying that, with everyone’s differing expectations, “it can sometimes feel overwhelming trying to juggle everyone’s expectations.”
School certainly doesn’t help either. As one West Campus student attests, “On top of social gatherings and parties, this time of year also comes with the stress of final exams.” What’s more, an overwhelming majority reported feeling the pressure that results from teachers cramming in excessive work, tests and curriculum in the last week, which definitely piles up.
The general conclusion drawn from respondents appears to be that while stress is a normal element of the holidays, in excess, it can be overwhelming, unhealthy, and simply a drag. For those reasons, it is imperative that we find tactics to mitigate stress.
In terms of solutions, the best and most effective strategies to cope with holiday stress, according to those interviewed, are those which provide a brief escape from the hustle and bustle of traditional festivities. For example, a few respondents reported that going for a walk or exercising gives them some much-needed relief. In the words of one active sophomore, “Even just taking 30 minutes to go for a run can improve your mood, decrease stress, and release endorphins, which can make you feel better overall.” Additionally, listening to music was another popular response. In many cases, this option provides an alternative to physical methods of escape, as with headphones, it is much easier to multitask and go about your day with music in your ear to bring some calmness.
Several people also listed activities like napping, engaging in hobbies, and taking periodic breaks from social interaction as helpful tactics to keep stress in control. Distractions like these can prove very useful tools, especially to introverts who may find it difficult to sustain continuous socialization. Not only do these activities calm the nerves, but they also send a signal to relatives that you need a little privacy and time to yourself.
Similarly, setting boundaries and carving out alone time is crucial to some, including Margaret Oehmke (12) . She says her advice to others experiencing stress is “to know your limits and know that those limits can change at any point. You are always 100% entitled to taking a step back.”
In the eyes of many, a shift in mindset or perspective can easily reclaim the holidays from stress. On this note, one interviewee shares this: “If something doesn’t go as planned, I try to accept it and focus on finding other ways to accomplish it.” This acceptance that not everything can be or has to be perfect is a good step towards creating a healthier and more enjoyable relationship with holiday gatherings.
And for those worried about whether they’ll find a gift for everyone, the best strategy is to get ahead of the curve. One interviewee noted how she gives herself more time by starting the search for gifts earlier. This exercise in foresight can decrease your workload and thus your anxiety as well.
Overall, everyone has their own personalities and unique family dynamics, and thus face their own distinct combination of stressors. As we begin to fully indulge in the holiday spirit, I encourage all of you to follow some of this advice from your fellow West Campus students. Hopefully, reading through their experiences can help you identify causes of stress in your own family and embolden you to attempt to handle them with more care. It cannot be understated that the more we recognize the role of stress in holiday affairs and the more we try to cope with it, the more easily we can get back to what the holidays are all about — enjoying time with friends and family, in whatever form they take.
